Well today was first day back to work since dad passed, and it was rough enough. I work with marie curie with terminal patients so a little close to home, but its amazing how people who are experiencing their own grief can comfort someone one else. Spoke to mum on phone today and she sounded more positive, its very hard sometimes to stay upbeat as im grieving too but its a different grief, I couldnt imagine loosing my soul mate, my left arm, my everything. My heart aches for mum she has been so great but its hard seeing someone so lost, a bit like a small child missing a parent, actually thats how i feel at times, I know im a grown woman but when dad did pass I felt like I was too young to loose him, but i should be thankfull for the yrs we did have and look at the happy times. And there was a good few good times too if you have seen the pics of skegness when we went on holiday, oh my goodness did dad love that holiday at any opportunity he was up on stage with the red coats or surrounded by pretty girls, it was mr goodtime and made me laugh especially when he straddled a chair and pretended to be a jockey and fell.